My love affair with productive procrastination.

I'm going to be blunt. Today I'm having one of those days where all I want to do is run and hide from my responsibilities. I think I have a cycle. It goes a little something like this:

1. I start at normal. My days are filled mostly with work-type stuff (actual work, chores, etc.) but nicely balanced with some fun--perhaps an episode of Glee at the end of the day, some hubby time or a conversation with a friend. These are good days.

2. I realize normal aint gettin schtuff done and haul it. I raise my expectations of myself. These are the days I get up, clean the entire apartment, go to work, come home, produce like 3 freelance articles and sass just about everyone I encounter because I'm so "stressed."

3. I crack. This step usually involves a very loving chiding from hubby to the tune of, "You're crazy. Stop it. Go to sleep." I realize he's right and lay in bed with cookie dough ice cream.

4. I languish in my relaxation and avoid things I don't absolutely have to do. If anyone has ever Facebooked me and waited about a week for a response, step 4 is the culprit. I unplug and do whatever the heck I want, and eventually go kicking and screaming back into normalcy.

I'm hard core "step 4-ing it" right now. I don't even want to check my email. Today I went to such lengths as donning my bathing suit for a waterfall hike with hubby, going to 3 grocery stores so I could get the supplies for vegan mac and cheese (and we're not even vegan...or vegetarian for that matter), and suddenly deciding I needed to learn how to curl my hair with a flat iron, all to avoid a few simple tasks I needed to get done around the house...aaand some stuff having to do with that whole moving and finding a new job thing...aaand some freelance writing stuff...let's just say the list might be on the long-ish side. There's also a sink full of dishes glaring at me from the kitchen, and an overflowing hamper of laundry juuust making the corner of my peripheral vision as I type this. That's what hubby's for, right? Kidding. Kind of. 


I will say this: I am definitely a productive procrastinator. I hiked, grocery shopped, cooked and got glamorous today. Not too shabby.

Anyway, while wasting yet more time on the internet, I found an interesting little thing in the NPR archives...perhaps my testosterone levels are to blame for my lack of drive? Maybe this cycle coincides with another..ahem...cycle? Anyway, we're quickly merging on to the TMI highway. I'll spare you. If you're interested in reading about testosterone, initiative and consequential career choices clickity-clack that link. Here it is again in case you're too lazy to scroll (it's all part of step 4...don't be ashamed).

Have a great night!

That grad school thing

So with all the wonderful free time I've had so far on my first day off in a long time I've been doing a little thinking. The hubby and I have a kind of "deal" that we're going to take turns going to college as long as we both want to. Hubby's gonna nail the undergrad stuff...and then, if I so desire, it'll be my turn to do some grad school. 

Now, don't get me wrong, I really would love to get my master's, or even a doctorate...I'm just not sure what I'd get it in. I've thought about some general literature geek things, perhaps marketing, journalism, creative writing...documentary making (it exists)?  There are A LOT of things I'd be happy to study, being a bona fide nerd. However, I want to study something that actually gets me closer to a goal and, ya know, can pay off the debt I'll inevitably acquire during the process. 

And then while it would be tons of fun to go back to school and be in that academic environment again, if I could work, make enough money and be happy with my employment situation, I'm not sure that I'd do the school thing...at least not right now. I want to be sure I'm doing it for the right reasons, ya know? 

This is what I'm afraid of.

Suggestions? Comments? Don't forget to share with a friend, and have a happy Monday!

Thank god for tomorrow.

Okay, so I've survived the phone interview. Phew. There was only one person on the other end and she was very nice--I feel like I accurately represented myself, so we'll see what happens. Even if I don't get the job, it's nice to know that phone interviews aren't actually as scary as my over active imagination makes them out to be.

Anyway, let's cut to the chase. Tomorrow is my first day off in 21 days. Holy crap, I'm so excited. I know some people who can work non-stop, no problem. I'm not one of them. In fact, I probably fall squarely into the "somewhat wimpy" category, if we're going to measure tolerance for no days off. So naturally, I've been planning  tomorrow for a few days now. I'm craving...

1. A morning of sleep. I'ma sleep in until whenever my body wants. I'm not setting an alarm, and if I wake up and feel like going back to sleep, I'm going to do just that.

2. Some YouTube. Yeah, I'm subscribed to kind of a lot of people. It's dorky...and I love it. I need to catch up on some of my faves.

3. Probably an entire novel. Is The Fountainhead too ambitious?

4. Netflix. There are a few documentaries on my list, and a few TV series that I might try out.

5. Puppy? I might walk my mom's dog if the sun comes out for a bit and I actually decide to get dressed. This one's a little iffy, and very much depends on my laziness factor.

6. Hubby time. When hubby gets home tomorrow night I'll be chillin' with him. It feels like it's been forever since we've had a significant amount of time together.

7. Resist the urge to "catch up." I'm not going to go grocery shopping, vacuum, mop, do laundry, clean the bathroom or work on writing projects, even though some of these things very desperately need doing. This is so not me, but honestly I don't care if the apartment is a mess and we're out of milk and bread. I really don't.

No joke, my mouth is watering a little bit thinking about tomorrow (weird, I know). I'm super excited for some real time off to do whatever the heck I want. One more shift of human services job tonight and I'm home free!

Oh, and I'm glad to see Blogger.com survived the rapture/zombie apocalypse ;-) 

My secret fear of all things phone.

I can't sleep and I feel the need to create...so you're getting another blog post whether you like it or not!

Here's the deal. I'm super nervous right now. I have a phone interview tomorrow morning (8:00am, yikes) with a company that might let me write/edit/proofread their website and any other content that reaches the eyes of the public. Honestly, interviews don't freak me out that much...but a phone interview, well that's a whole other story.  There's something inherently awkward about the phone. We've all felt it--that dead silence with no body language or facial expressions to mediate, or when people on both ends start talking at the same time and just keep stumbling over one another's vocal ejaculations, until both finally regain footing about five minutes later. I know I'm going to be awkward at some point. I also have this weird fear that they're going to surprise me with several interviewers on a conference call. I've never been on a conference call before, but I can only imagine that the awkwardness gets upped a power for each additional person. And I have a killer introductory handshake. Damn it.

On the bright side, I just broke my thumbnail, like hardcore-past-the-fingertip-with-blood broke it...so they won't have to see the creation of this self-proclaimed band aid architect currently requiring three band aids to cover the tip of my thumb. That's good. They also won't have to know that my only blazer is really wrinkly and that my iron is covered in some kind of gunk that ruins clothes. Another plus.

Still, my fears outnumber the advantages. And all the internet has to offer me is stupid advice like "don't flush the toilet in the middle of your interview" and "get enough sleep the night before." Ha. Sleep is for the weak.

Anyway, I guess I just have to do my best and see what happens...and use lots of cheat sheets because they can't see them either ;-). I'll keep you posted.

Comments? Phone interview advice/stories? Have a great night!

The thoughts that leak out my ears

Hokay, it's really hard not to blog for the better part of a week...but I've been needing sleep. I feel like I've had to drag myself to bed and cram a stream of ideas back into my head via my ear before I lay down so they don't seep out and become un-bloggable later. Holy moly. Perhaps I should just write a mega post right now? Here goes--themes of the week. Feel free to skip ones that don't sound interesting to you. This post is a beast.

1. Nostalgia. With that whole moving and finding a new job thing looming somewhere on the not-so-defined horizon, I've been getting nostalgic and thoughtful about the jobs I have. Take retail job for example. My boss has been so good to me over the years. She's fun to work with/for, and it seems like she's always been there for me, hours in tow, whenever I've needed work. Looking back, there are months where I said something to the effect of "hang on tight because I don't have any plans but I want to work for you until I do/after my plans fall through" and she's gone with it. It makes me sad that this might actually be the last summer I work for her. Aaaand then take human services job. This one snuck up on me. The whole thing is pretty short term. I started working there in February and will move this summer sometime...I didn't really expect to get attached to the people I work with or anything like that--but I have. I've literally caught myself tearing up a tiny tiny bit a couple times this week (granted, I'm tired...) and have had to pull myself together and remember that I've still got a while left with them. I've learned a lot about myself through this job, too. When I left teaching I was worried that my whole "working with people" plan was now invalid...but I don't think that's the case. I've loved this job (most of the time ;-)) and can move on confident that serving and helping people who need it is something I enjoy and am capable of doing. Geez...I guess I'm going to miss the jigsaw puzzle of part-time schedules that is currently my career.

2. What is a job? All of this nostalgia has the philosophical gears a turnin' once again. Brace yourselves. I've been thinking about what a job should be. I mean we spend most of our waking hours there for the duration of adulthood...it has to be about more than making money, right? It seems silly to me that we would spend 8 waking hours at work, so we can enjoy the other few waking hours with the money we make. But what am I shooting for if it's about more than paying the bills? I mean, retail job is honestly something I do because I like my boss, I get some secret amusement out of the people who come into the store, and I feel invested in the business' well being after working there for a few years. Human services job is another story. I was thinking the other day that this is actually something I'd do for free every now and then because I like it (bosses, if you're reading this--don't get any ideas ;-)). This job is very different from my retail job. It's about meeting basic human needs for people who would otherwise live compromised lives. It's pretty awesome that I get to be a part of that. Aaand then there's the freelance writing career I'm trying to build up on the side. The main focus of that job is nurturing my creativity, sharpening my mind and improving my craft. It is, in a way, a pretty self-centered thing...but then again the whole reason I do it is to give others something to read. However, doing all my work online, I don't really see the people who appreciate my work. I might get an email or a few comments on an article...but that's about it. Pretty impersonal. So what the heck am I looking for?

3. Being a gal. Have you been keeping up with all the Schwarzenegger/ Strauss-Kahn stuff? Don't get me wrong--they're two very different things. One involves a possible sexual assault while the other does not. However, they have both helped spark an interesting train of thought for me this week. I've been interested in all the press, especially on those nasty gossip websites, surrounding the women involved. It seems to me that it's always the same. The men involved in sexual scandals get a big reaction, and rightfully so. The public is disappointed and their reputations are ruined, possibly forever. But then there's a quieter, yet substantial, buzz around the women involved. Who are they? What do they look like? I think the question we're really trying to answer is, what attracted him to her...even though attraction to another person is probably verrry low on the list of motivations for most of these men. Then I read this article in the NYT, and they seem to agree, albeit more elegantly. I guess I just get frustrated with the male-centered culture that I can't seem to get away from. Resisting the temptation to think to myself, "ooh who is this woman who was pursued by this high-profile, powerful man," is easier said than done. It frustrates me, however, that the internet isn't even trying to resist. **Insert connection to career issues here (I know, cut me some slack)**

I'll stop there for today, and I'll try to be a bit more regular with the bloggin' this weekend and into next week...hopefully I'll have a couple days off :-). As always, comment on any of the themes of the week below, share this with anyone who might like it, and have a great day!

Oh, for a bit more time...

So, I'm working like 20 days in a row right now without a day off. I'm not sure how it happened--all of a sudden retail job and human services job seem to reaaaally need my time. It's fine for now...I just hope it doesn't go on for too much longer. Honestly, I miss the hubby. 

But that's not even the hardest thing about it. I know that a lot of you readers are in the same boat. There's something else that you're striving for beyond your current job(s). Whether that means you need to spend loads of time applying to other jobs, need time to work on that "other thing," or maybe a little bit of both, it can be really frustrating to not find that time anywhere. 

Basically, I'm frustrated because this has been a week filled with some of my worst writing ever. I have some new writing gigs, which is great, but very little time to work on them. I count on having 2 days off every week typically so I can spend one writing and then have one for myself. Hubby says I should just start taking shots of espresso and smoking cigarettes. And hey, if espresso could proofread and cigarettes could create original, energized syntax...I just might. 

Writing takes a surprising amount of my energy if I'm going to do it well. I'll draft a piece and then spend kind of a long time self-editing. I'll leave a piece feeling like I just ran some sort of ultra-dorky marathon where imprecise diction means you have to start all over again. Lately, I haven't had time to go back to the starting line--and my clients have noticed. It's just kind of a bummer. 

I don't mean for this to sound whiney--I just think it's something that a lot of us go through. You have certain obligations to your job(s) that unfortunately affect other parts of your life, sometimes negatively. 

But this makes me feel better:

Have a great day--and comment down there if you want :-)

Statistically, you're probably a money worshipper

Oh. My. Goodness. I know. I've been a really bad blogger. However, I have tons of awesome excuses (it was hubby's finals week so he needed the laptop, I'm doing more paid writing, I've got a 7-day workweek this week, yadda, yadda, yadda). 


Whadya say we put all that behind us and blog where we left off. Here goes.

Last time I checked, the majority of Americans said they were some kind of Christian. An even greater majority says that they believe in some sort of god. However, I guess there's a new religion out there...one that maybe we didn't even know we had...

This morning, I read a pretty cool article in the New York Times about our attitudes toward money here in the US of A. It's based on a recent academic study trying to find a way to categorize people's various pathological relationships with money. Think you're doing okay? Turns out, if money creates any kind of anxiety in your life, you probably fall into one of their pathological categories. I think that might just include all of us...

If you want to read the whole article, I linked it above. I'm going to focus on the one part of the study that I think relates most to this blog. As you know if you've read pretty much any of my posts, I have a lot of friends who are somehow discontent in their current jobs. They're people who maybe still don't know what they want to be when they grow up, "fell into" a job that's not as satisfying as they'd hoped, or know what they want but can't seem to get there. I fall into some mix of those categories as well. Although this group of younger workers is discontent for a variety of different reasons...there seems to be one thing we're all discontentabout. I'll give you one guess. 

Yeah, it's money. I have friends living at home because they're not comfortable moving out on what they make. I have friends collecting partial unemployment because of their low-paying jobs. I know people dabbling in food stamps every so often, or just living on a really small grocery list. It's often not the actual pay that's necessarily horrible (although sometimes it is), but the student loan payments, high car insurance (that 18-24 age bracket...), and sometimes even that data plan that's responsible for daily tweets in the double digits...

Regardless of the reason, I have heard each of these people (including myself) say something like "If I had more money I'd be less stressed and happier." Turns out, belief in that very phrase is a sign of a pathology psychologists are starting to call money worship. And it afflicts the majority of Americans, according to the study linked above. Psychologists are even starting to see other signs of unhealthy behavior within this money worship attitude. We're doing all kinds of unhealthy psychological things, like displacement ("If it weren't for the greed on Wall Street I'd be wealthier and happier.") and denial ("I don't have a money problem, I'm simply feeling the stress of a recession."). Money worship affects more young people than old, more white than non-white, and the same number of males and females. 

Well geez, is it really so bad to want a higher paying job? Most of the people I know just feel like they do more work than they're compensated for. Psychologists agree that it's not so much wanting more money that's the issue--it's believing that you will be happier because you make more money. Actually, there's a relatively high occurance of depression among the wealthy (and lottery winners).  Just some food for thought. 

Anyway, I hope you have a great Friday! As always, comment below if you so desire, and share this link with your friends!

Oh, and if you want some more, I also wrote this: You're Dead? Great! Let Me Steal Your Tax Refund

I'm feeling like a contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?"

Okay, so a bit of an update first. As many of you regular readers know, I have an "official" (yeah, that's right) plan for the ol' job search. The move will probably happen August-ish, and in the meantime I'll be doing two things. First, I'll be looking for a part-time job where we're moving--this part is pretty flexible. I'm really not going to turn my nose up at anything that pays around what I'm making at the part-time jobs now. But secondly, and more importantly, I'm going to be building up my freelance writing to a legitimate part-time workload. It's a bit crazy right now because I'm obviously working 40 hours a week, aaand applying for writing jobs, aaand finding time to write for the jobs I'm getting. However, the most challenging part of it all is the sheer amount of rejections I receive. It's hard when you're writing online because you find your leads on job boards that are...well...online (and available to the whole wide world). Each rejection feels like wasted time--it takes a while to find leads and create writing samples if I don't already have a sample laying around that's appropriate for the client.

 

However, I know that this is all part of the nature of all things freelance. Yeah, I'll be able to find a "niche" someday where I'm more likely to get jobs, but I don't have that yet. I'm kinda just applying to anything that I know I could deliver on. In a weird way it reminds me of "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?"...

 

Oh yeah, you know the show. All I'm saying is that starting a new career isn't all that different than being on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" Here's what I mean...

 

1. It's all made out to be very scary--perhaps scarier than necessary. 

 

You remember the dark studio with the eerie bluish lighting. The audience seated around a small circular stage with only a remarkably exposed desk-thing for the contestant to sit at. You get "life lines" which implies that it's so darn hard you won't be able to do it alone...and then Regis would always ask, very dramatically, "Is that your final answer?" I guess I liken the eerie lighting and the this-is-a-life-or-death-situation mood of the show with the whole dog-eat-dog way we talk about starting a new career. There are countless blogs out there about how to shake an interviewer's hand correctly, and what color lipstick is appropriate for a job interview, you'd think that if you wear the wrong underwear while you edit your resume you're doomed to lifelong unemployment. Weird, I know--it's just the vibe I'm getting.

 

2. It's pretty easy to feel like you've lost it all. 

 

Remember those people...they'd be crazy high up on the list of questions, maybe even at the million dollar question, without any lifelines left...and they'd screw it up! Remember what would happen then? They'd leave with like $500,000, or some benchmark amount far less than what they were going for, but still A LOT of money. However, some of those guys would straight up cry at the end of the episode, Regis looking on with perfect TV compassion. While the majority of Americans don't like their jobs, the majority of Americans still have houses, food, and pretty okay lives. All I'm saying is that sometimes it's hard for me to get another rejection email from a potential freelance client...but then again I have gotten a couple jobs, and have two part-time jobs that really aren't so bad. It's hard when you get thisclose to the million, but $500,000 really aint too shabby. 

 

3. The lifelines really can make you...or break you.

 

Okay, so if a question comes up about Major League Baseball, and Uncle Joey (just noticed the subconscious Full House reference after I typed that...) happens to be a sports buff extrordinaire, use your phone a friend! But if it's a question about fashion design, maybe Uncle Joey isn't your guy this time around. Career experts are always talking about utilizing your network...which is great...unless Pricilla, your 3rd cousin twice removed, thinks she knows a perfect solution to your predicament. You get the idea.

 

Just a thought in my odd little mind--Have a great night!

 

Don't forget to comment if you have thoughts to share! Feel free to share this link with anyone you think might be interested. Oh, and if you're feeling ready for some new TSA horror stories, check out this article I wrote: TSA = Totally Senseless Acts

How you're probably putting yourself in a box

I guess we can't avoid it. Don't we all have some sort of mechanism for defining ourselves? How else would we pretend to know ourselves as well as society demands us to? Being self-aware is a highly regarded quality, and people assume that you can describe yourself (jeez, especially in job interviews).

But isn't that kind of dangerous sometimes? Have you ever had someone oversimplify your personality? It happens to hubby and I all the time. He's Mr. Musician, and comes across as an artistic, intellectual, somewhat flighty type of person...whereas I come across as a little more pragmatic, people-oriented and structured. People love to assume that we're a classic case of "opposites attract," when really we're a lot more alike than people think. That whole intellectualism thing is a shared trait, and the hubby is actually pretty grounded most of the time (although I will admit he has his moments), while the "structured" vibe I guess I give off is a lot more relaxed than people typically think. Plus, we've both got that first-born headstrong pioneer thing goin' on. And besides, we change every day--we grow with each other.

Despite my frustration with oversimplifications, I do it to people all the time. How can we avoid it? In order to talk about a person, or anything really, don't we have to simplify it to fit within the constraints of language?

But the real problem arises when we do it to ourselves. Sometimes we get so caught up in defining ourselves with language, that it's easy to forget that we're much more complex than we're able to express. I think that it's easy to miss opportunities this way. I remember in college, for example, thinking about majoring in writing, but assuming that I was too much of an extrovert for something like that, even though writing remained one of my favorite pastimes throughout my college career. I know people who have turned down leadership opportunities because they have labeled themselves "helpers"--even though they end up taking charge during the process naturally anyway.

Just a thought for today. How do you define yourself? Is it limiting? Is it accurate? How do others define you? Are they accurate? Do you feel a little put in a box?

Something to think about.

Comments? Anecdotes? Put 'em below please! And have a great day :-)

Why your job should be like sex

Happy Monday, and Happy May! Maybe it's finally spring after all...

So, I've talked to a few friends lately who have questioned the concept of "making it" with your career. I've questioned that whole idea as well, especially recently. Do we ever truly arrive in a career or in life in general? I don't know too many people who are completely satisfied in either of these areas. However, I do think that we can be satisfied enough. We can reach a point where we think, things could be better, and perhaps I'll still strive for that, but really I'm doing pretty darn well and I wouldn't be too torn up if things stayed this way.

But that raises the question of creating a way to tell when you're there...or even close to there. I'm the kind of person who is always hesitant to just sit back and enjoy, because what if there's something better for those willing to work a little harder? I'll never know unless I try...

You can see the problem unfolding. Ironically enough, by assuming that I can be "satisfied enough," I automatically feel the need to simultaneously reach the point of "enough" and exceed it, just in case there's something better to be had. Yeah, I have a hard time with the concept of enough. But I did some thinking this morning and came up with an analogy that helps me out--if you're even half as neurotic as me, perhaps you'll appreciate it too :-)

A good career situation is like good sex. Go with me here...

1.  You're finding ways to keep it fresh. 


Like good sex, you need ways to jazz up your job every now and ten. I think if your career has room for innovation and fresh ideas, you've got a pretty good gig. If you feel like there are no opportunities to freshen your routine, you're probably not going to be happy with your job for very long.

2. It captivates you.


While you're working, you're in "the zone." You're not thinking about everything you have to do after work (or that you wish you were doing instead). You're focused, in the moment, and enjoying yourself--at least a good majority of the time. You might even think about it when you're not at work...

3. You are regularly rewarded. 


Ahem. Like sex, your job should, erm, satisfy you. You should be recognized for your work in one way or another and have some kind of reward you deem appropriate. Whether that's monetary, or respect and accolade amongst colleagues, it needs to be something that works for you.

4. You see the importance in the routine. 


Obviously there are times in your career where things will get a little rote or dull. You'll find slumps. The important thing is that you still see the value in doing your work and are able to work through and eventually move out of your slumps. Sometimes things will get routine, but it's still important to, umm, "do it."

5. It enhances your life goals and who you want to be.


Just like sex has the ability to enhance a relationship, your career should enhance who you are. It should be something that draws out qualities that you like to see in yourself, and that challenges you to be who you want to be. It should be a good thing for your development as a person...just like sex should be good for the development of your relationship.

Hopefully, those little analogies weren't as awkward for you as they were for me (hi, mom ;-) ). As always, have a great night!

You know you want to comment on this one. And don't forget to share this link for extra brownie points! 

So, I've been thinking about Bandura lately...

What? I have an Education major and a Psychology minor, and from time to time I ponder the work of major theorists. So get over it ;-).

The reason I've been sitting around pondering social cognitive theory lies, once again, in my obsession with somehow conquering the world of the 9-5 "typical" job. I think it's pretty safe to say that I think 9-5 jobs, especially those that actually are more like 8-6 or 7, are not so practical, or appealing, for the younger workforce. That said, more flexible jobs with less typical schedules or jobs that allow working from home are still in the minority...so it takes a little ingenuity to find what you're looking for.

I've heard some bloggers refer to those who can be successful at a career on their own terms as some kind of superstar, a go-getter, or even as "entitled" (yeah, I'm looking at you Generation Y haters). I think what they're actually referring to was coined by Bandura in the '70s--a little thing called self-efficacy. Self-efficacy is essentially the belief that you can overcome obstacles by setting and reaching goals. Basically, you believe you can get stuff done. Bandura found that people with a high sense of self-efficacy view problems as challenges to master, develop deeper interest in tasks, have higher levels of commitment to tasks and activities, and recover quickly from setbacks and disappointments. I don't know about you, but that sounds like the kind of person who can take control of their career and create a rockin' work-life balance along with an adequate paycheck.

Some tips? People with high self-efficacy generally got that way because of...

1. Precedence. Believe it or not, to believe in your ability to succeed, you typically need to have succeeded before.

2. Seeing it done. Witnessing success helps you believe that you can do it, too. I guess all those career experts telling you to talk to people you admire about how they achieved success are not only on to something practically, but also psychologically.

3. Pats on the back. If you have people encouraging you along the way, your belief in your abilities skyrockets. Hooray for positive and supportive friends!

4. Your reactions to your own reactions. Meta-reactions maybe? Anyway, basically when you react to a situation by, say, experiencing anxiety, it's not so much the anxiety that counts, but your reaction to the anxiety. Do you let it run rampant? Do you back out of something because of it? If you can decrease stress levels and learn to "push through" anxiety by taking action instead of running away (fight instead of flight), your sense of self-efficacy will probably improve.

So, this is one thing I'm tackling. I haven't been 100% clear on this yet, but you could say I'm officially pursuing (read: ravenously scouring the internet for) some writing opportunities...and I'm getting some. But more often than not I'm getting rejected. That whole "bouncing back" part of my own self-efficacy is getting tested. Generally, however, I feel like I can do it. Wouldn't it be awesome if when hubby and I make the big move, all I need is one part-time job because of my writing stuff?

...yeah, its a kinda lofty goal...but I might just tuck that sense of self-efficacy in my back pocket and go for it...

Thoughts? Goals to share? Comment below. Also, don't forget to share with a friend!


P.S.- In case you haven't already, here's where you can read one of my more recent articles! If you like social commentary, this is a pretty fun site. Fukushima and Chernobyl: Are we competent enough for nuclear power?

Bullies invade the workplace, teenager style

In the last couple years I've been re-introduced to the world of the teenager. Throughout my student teaching, my actual teaching, my contact with the teens at my church, and my 16-year-old sister's group of friends, I've been a little taken aback by just how cruel young people can be. The small remarks, the occasional sarcastic facebook wall post, and the relentless talking behind each other's backs--you know what I'm talking about--it's exhausting. I find myself wondering, when will they grow out of all of this?

 

Well, the answer for some is unfortunately never. I've been hearing a lot of stories from friends, and even have some of my own (not in any of my current jobs) about grown-up mean girls and boys in the workplace. And apparently it's not just common in my circle of friends. A careerbuilder.com survey found that 34% of  adult women and 22% of adult men are being "bullied" at work. That sounds crazy! But take a look at their list of defining criteria for bullying...you might be able to check off a few yourself...

 

1. Your comments have been dismissed or not acknowledged.

2. You have been falsely accused of statements you didn't make.

3. You have been harshly criticized.

4. You have been forced into doing work that isn't really your job.

5. Different standards/policies have been used for you than other workers.

6. You have been given mean looks.

7. Others have gossiped about you.

8. Your boss yelled at you in front of other coworkers.

9. Belittling comments have been made about your work in front of others.

10. Someone else took credit for work you did.

 

...Yikes. I've definitely had 1, 4, 6, and I suspect 7 done to me at a previous job (thank goodness I haven't had any problems at my current jobs). At this previous job I was working in a high-stress environment that, instead of emphasizing teamwork let chatter about who's-mad-at-who and overly-dramatic-and-totally-stressed-out attitudes rule the roost. I can think of a face for every single criterion on this list--and that's sad. I'd like to say that I've heard so much about this happening because I know a lot of young people working in places where people are generally dissatisfied with their jobs...and that's part of it...but I can also think of professionals working in places where employees enjoy their work and are not "bored" who have definitely experienced a few of the misfortunes on this list--some several times.

 

This is one of those things that us Generation Y-ers are supposedly fed up with. I've blogged quite a bit about today's twenty and thirty-somethings' apparent dissatisfaction with the "traditional" workplace...and this is one of those things that keeps coming up. I've seen it referred to as the drama of office politics, or underhanded/unprofessional behavior in the workplace--and there are Generation Y workers seeing alternative career paths because of it. Yet, in around half of the stories of workplace bullying I've heard about, the perpetrator is a young Generation Y-er...and I hate to say that we're getting a bit of a negative reputation as gossiping, tactless individuals, especially among those older than us (35 or so and up). I'd like to see some sort of stats published on the topic--I want to know how many Gen Y bullies there are out there versus how many wonderfully professional young people--because I really want to believe that we're no meaner than past generations. I've seen workplace bullying by 20-year-olds and 50-year-olds alike.

 

Regardless, it affects how I view the workplace. I'm always careful to keep coworkers out of my circle of friends. Maybe I'm a little paranoid, but after seeing so much workplace bullying at that previous job, it's just more comfortable for me that way. I'm also that possibly pretentious coworker who will ask to change the subject when workplace gossip starts to run amuk. It's just the way I'm most comfortable dealing with it--I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut in the face of put-downs. I'm happiest, however, when I'm able to avoid the drama altogether. I get a little antsy when I realize that a coworker has pegged me as someone they're comfortable gossiping to. That's no good in my book.

 

Do you percieve workplace bullying teenager-style as a real problem? How do you deal? Put it below :-). And, for all you overachievers, don't forget to share this link! Have a great night.

The most ballin' place to be a customer service rep

I always love hearing those stories about Google headquarters and their gym/rock-climbing wall/free lunches/free massages/in-house doctor/pool filled with chocolate pudding (okay, I made that last one up). How cool would that be? Can you imagine a free, hot, restaurant-quality lunch daily, not to mention all those other perks (SO many of which I haven't even listed), all in the name of employee retention, productivity, and happiness? That's a company that works hard to create satisfied, valued workers.

Of course Google is the one we always hear about, but I've noticed some less expected companies are starting to take a cue from Google and are reportedly reaping the rewards. I love this kind of thing because it just goes to show how much people will give to a task (in this case, a career) if the person asking them to do it also takes pride in catering to their needs and wants. I think I might blog about this every now and then, whenever I hear about an unlikely company going the extra mile for their employees. So, here goes the first one in what will hopefully be a pretty interesting series...

...the best place to work as a Customer Service Representative: Zappos.com

Yeah, you know the job. A Customer Service Representative is that person who answers the phone when you call in, foaming at the mouth, because the website has lost your order yet claims it was shipped. You generally don't call these guys just to say "good job." They deal with a lot of angry people...yet Zappos.com (yeah, that shoe website) has a much higher retention rate for the position than the national average. Let's take a look at some of the ways they choose to do things differently:

1. They have spontaneous parades through the call center/ cubicles.

2. One of the company's core values is to "create fun and a little weirdness."

3. Interviews take place in "themed" rooms like, say, Cher's dressing room or a mock up of a talk show, Oprah style (these are real examples).

4. An interview question they ask everyone: "On a scale from 1 to 10, how weird would you say you are?"

5. Free lunch :-)

6. 25-cent vending machines, where all proceeds go to charity.

7. They have a rule that all new hires have to work in a call center for one month, regardless of their position, as part of their customer service training.

8. Senior employees receive the same benefits as those at the very bottom of the totem pole--no extras.

9. HR actively seeks out people who say they enjoy socializing with colleagues.

10. The company maintained all these perks/values even when they were bought by Amazon.com in 2009.

Okay, so while "Customer Service Rep" might not be at the top of my list of potential careers, the corporate culture at Zappos intrigues me, and I've only really covered the tip of the iceberg with this list. Oh, and if you go to the careers section of their website, you're greeted with a music video, made by current employees, describing the company. And don't send them a cover letter--they want a YouTube video instead :-).

Comments/suggestions of other companies to talk about can go below. Have a friend who might be interested (or maybe you're just a blog-reading overachiever)? Share the link! Have a great night! 

My debut as a philosophizer

So, here I am, sitting on the couch after an evening shift at human services job, stuffing my face with leftover Easter ham, feeling a little brain dead because I just got home from work. Hubby jumps on this opportunity to talk to me about some philosophy...perfect timing. I was having a pretty hard time being interested, not gonna lie. But then he said something that struck me as pretty relevant to the way I've been feeling about human services job and my job preferences in particular.In Eastern countries, thinking of the good of the whole above the good of the individual is apparently a pretty common thing, whereas over here we're much more concerned with the good of the individual, assuming that the whole will take care of itself.

Immediately I thought of the brave workers at the Fukushima nuclear power plant. I read an interview with one of those workers and he said he didn't even think twice about staying there to work throughout the disaster. I can't find the exact interview again, but he said something along the lines of, even though he's aware that continuing to work in the power plant after the tsunami will probably cause his death sooner or later, he feels honored to be doing so for the good of the Japanese people. I couldn't help but wonder if we would have the same attitude in the U.S.?

Then I started thinking about my human services job. I've hinted in other posts about how much I'm enjoying my time at this job. I come home very tired, but with a sense of satisfaction with how I spent my day. I love the people I work with, and overall it's really a lot of fun. Tonight, however, as hubby was philosophizing at the other end of the couch, I realized that there's another reason why I enjoy this job so much. It's the feeling that I'm working toward the good of everyone I work with, and that generally that's how other staff I've worked alongside have treated the job as well. It's the feeling of working as a team to achieve good for other people that leaves me so satisfied at the end of my shift. It's a much different mindset than a lot of the other places I've worked, even other places that claim to be striving for good in other people's lives.

So, that said, I think this is something that might need to make it on my list of "career must-haves." It makes things a heck of a lot more fun :-)

Got comments? Down below, please. Got friends? Share this blog! Have a great night!

P.S.- Easter week was a little rocky with the blogging, I know, but I'm back to a more regular schedule this week!

The ups and downs of my bank account

In the last year or so, I've realized that I'm becoming a very money-conscious person. I made what seemed like a fortune as a teacher in the fall, and now work my two part time jobs, for which hours can vary, and make a little income on the side whenever a website feels like publishing some of my writing. Needless to say, some weeks are better than others on the ole bank account. Hubby is in a similar boat. His job requires overtime some weeks, but others it's barely enough to be called part time.

 

The majority of my twentysomething friends can relate. Many of us haven't found a 9-5 niche, but work a few different jobs to piece together an income, or work at a job that's busier seasonably causing hours to fluctuate in different times of year. If you've read this blog somewhat regularly, you know that I kinda like having a couple different jobs (at least for right now). I enjoy the variety my lifestyle offers, the different hours I end up working (I'm not busy every night nor am I busy every day), and the ability to "try out" a few different types of jobs.

 

However, there is a little bit of a downside--I don't do so well with unpredictablility. I find myself pinching pennies wherever I can, "just in case" the paychecks we have don't stay consistent. I hatespending the least little bit of extra money when I don't absolutely have to. Hubby had to practically push me through the door of a clothing store yesterday because I only had one pair of jeans left without holes. Just today, I've been beating myself up about buying Chinese food for lunch at work, all because I ran out of time getting ready this morning and didn't have time to go back home for lunch (I had human services job 7-11:30 and retail job 12-8). A rational person would figure, it's okay. I really needed some new jeans, and it's not like I eat out very often when I'm at work...but not me. I'll be mad at myself for a little while yet.

 

It was never this bad when I was in the safe cushiony atmosphere of college where, while there were some bills I paid (car upkeep, gas, a few groceries, etc...) most of my money was "fun money." Now that there's a more direct relationship between working and having our apartment, our car, food, etc., I'm having to make some adjustments, and (as is typical for me) I'm erring on the side of caution. Being fairly cautious usually ends up being a wise choice for me...but lately I've caught myself thinking about money a little too often. I mean, we have enough. We're able to buy everything we need and even have a little left over...but somehow enough doesn't always feel like enough to worried little old me. Although I've been realizing that this change is maybe not so great for a week or so now, I read something today that was the icing on the cake.I came across a rather odd news headline that reads: "Termites eat millions of Indian rupees in bank". Ha! You might expect that to stress me out even more, being reminded of the impermanance of weath and all that, but instead something inside me clicked. When I read that story tonight, it made me feel so silly for getting all bent out of shape over how much money is enough for our itsy bitsy family. Those termites were hungry! They ate somewhere in the ballpark of 10 million rupees, which is about $222,000, stored in a steel safe behind reinforced walls and doors. Obviously, this is no fun for the people involved and the bankers and police that now have to participate in an investigation...but for some reason I kinda want to go give those termites a pat on the back. For them, all that money was nothing more than food--they were just getting what they needed to stay alive and well.

 

And doesn't my money do that for me? Yes it does, and comfortably so. I've developed a nice repertoire of budget-friendly meals, we have nice cushiony high-speed internet (and even Netflix--what luxury!), a good car, and an apartment that is just right for the two of us. Besides, it's no fun to see a job as nothing but a way to make money (although, I won't lie to you, if they didn't pay me I might stop showing up...). There are parts of my human services job that are very rewarding. I've already seen people make great strides toward individual goals in the short month that I've been working! I value the productivity and, occasionally, patience that my retail job has to offer. And, of course, writing for websites is just loads of fun...and I love seeing myself improve as I receive the feedback of a few different editors, not just the family and friends I'll actually let read something before it's "finished" (although you all are awesome).

 

So, way to go, termites! I think I'll be bookmarking that article just in case I ever need another reminder...

...Oh, and in case you're interested, I've had another article published! Check it out here: The Budget: No Money, No Morals

And have a great night!

 

Job search update: Why I'm such a chicken...and I'm sick of it!

Ahh! I know! It's been far far far too many days since my last post. A certain someone (whose name starts with "h" and ends with "ubby") left a certain laptop at work the other night, so, alas, there was no post, and yesterday was the day of laundry and much scrubbing around this little apartment of ours. Yeah, yeah, excuses, excuses. I'll cut to the chase.

I may have done something exciting today. I joined a few job websites that focus on telecommuting jobs, many of which are freelance writing and editing jobs. This may not seem like such a big deal--I mean, what does it entail? Creating a username and password? Uploading a resume? What do I want, a medal?

Well, it's more than that for me. You know that feeling when you make a promise to yourself (many a New Year's Resolution to get in shape come to mind) and sometimes it's just so hard to take that first step (getting your lazy butt to the gym)? That's what this is like for me. As you all know, I love to write, and recently getting paid a little bit to do so for some websites has been really rewarding. I've been "testing the waters" so to speak, by submitting an article here and there, but I haven't  really considered freelance writing full time, or even part time, to be something I could actually achieve. In other words, I've been too chicken to actually try to earn significant income with my writing.

Every job search article I read along the lines of how-to-get-your-rear-in-gear tells me that I just need to take the first step. And then I just need to take the next step after that. And then the next, etc. etc. But that's hard for me! It's so much easier and less scary to say I'm too overwhelmed, or that it's just too hard to work my way to "the top" (or even the middle!) in freelance writing. Well, I'm sick of being a chicken! So I decided to fold up the ol' security blanket and put it on the top shelf of the closet for a while. I might even lock the closet door. Regardless, I'm going to be applying for some writing jobs that I can do wherever we're living, and we'll see what I can get.

Oh, and by the way, this is step 2. Telling all of you about my intentions is just as hard as signing up for those websites...because now it's not my little secret. It's not something I can just switch out with the security blanket in a couple weeks if I change my mind...and that's a good thing. So here goes! Don't worry, I'll keep you posted :-).

Comments? You know where they go. Got some friends? Share away!


Have a great night :-)

A little bit exciting...

So, today something a little bit exciting happened. Ready for it? I'm published! Well, at least according to the internet ;-)

I've written things on the internet before, like this blog and some stuff for Associated Content, but never for someone else's website or anything like that. So today I'm going to do a little shameless self-promotion. The website I'm writing for (yes, there's more to come) is www.commentarista.com, a social commentary site that's been a lot of fun for me to read lately. Today, my article is the first thing that pops up when you visit the page because it's the most recently published. However, if you'd rather not navigate through the rest of the website, here's the link to my article: Pleeeeease read meeeee

I suppose this is kinda just a sham of a blog post meant to redirect you to the article I wrote...

....

Farting in the face of "The Man"

Yes, that's a painting (by 15th century painter, Tver) depicting Jesus' procession into Jerusalem shortly before his crucifixion, which we now remember as Palm Sunday--which just so happens to be today. Palm Sunday is one of my favorite days in the whole year to go to church. There's joyful celebration, often the waving of palms...but yet that joyfulness is tempered by the ironic and potent reminder that just a few days after celebrating Jesus' entry into the city, the people decided to crucify him! Palm Sunday church services tend to haunt me for this very reason. The nature of the occasion, all laden with irony, prompts self-examination on my part...It's a humbling day for me, to say the least. 

However, today I didn't attend a Palm Sunday church service because I was working at my human services type part time job (which was pretty fun today, by the way). So when I got home this afternoon I decided to look up a few online sermons...and discovered that there are some pretty weird ones out there, some of which I can even relate to the job search process! So, here goes. A Palm-Sunday-themed job search blog post. 

The connections I've drawn between Palm Sunday and the job search process (however loose they may be...) began with a little history lesson. Back in the days of the Roman Empire, the government was a pretty big deal. Such a big deal, in fact, that the Jews had to strike a kind of "bargain" with them to celebrate Passover. It went a little something like this:

1. A Roman Governor would process into the city of Jerusalem at the beginning of Passover on a horse (the animal symbolizes war and power). 

2. The Jews were expected to "worship" the civic official to show their dedication to the state religion.

3. The Jews could then, once they had paid their tribute to the state, worship throughout Passover however they liked. 

Sounds like an alright deal, right? Not quite. Judaism requires that the Jews worship no one besides their God. So they added a step...

1. Governor processes in...

2. Jews wave palms, shout, etc., to show their worship...

2a. Jews sneakily shout foreign words like "Hosanna" which means "Save us!"...they were actually insulting the government official, not worshiping him. Those sly foxes. 

3. The Jews do whatever they want for the rest of Passover. 

Now here's the part I really like. One of sermons I read includes an Ethiopian proverb here that goes like this: 

When the great king passes by, the wise peasant bows deeply, and farts.

Isn't that classy? But it's essentially what the Jews did to avoid worshiping someone they felt didn't deserve it. As far as the Governor probably knew, the Jews were fulfilling their end of the bargain--they could worship their God if the worshiped the state as well. And they appeared to do so to anyone who didn't know the double-meaning of the word "Hosanna"...in a worshipful sense "Save us" can have quite a bit of meaning. But add a few tablespoons of irony and a cup or so of political dissatisfaction, and they take on a whole new meaning. I find that there's something inexplicably loud about quiet protest. There's something particularly resonant about mockery when the mocked aren't aware that they're the butt of a joke. 

Alright, so how the heck am I going to relate this to the realm of all things career? Well, it just so turns out that  this kind of "secret mockery" is something that us Generation Y twenty and thirty somethings are criticized for in the workplace. Fortune Magazine goes into it in some depth in an article from waaaay back in 2007, but the idea is echoed in many of the blogs I frequent. Generation Y workers are just annoyingly confident enough  to question everything, yet at the same time care very much about overachieving and standing out as, well, outstanding, in the workplace. In other words, we care enough about our rep at work to feign a little butt-kissing for the boss...but underneath it all we disapprove of a lot of office practices. We question the legitimacy of 9-5 workdays and late nights and weekends at the office. We find office bureaucracy just pointless enough to disregard. And yet, we remain outwardly charming and compliant enough to not get canned. The writer of that Fortune Magazine article finds all of this pretty annoying. I, however, see it as us simpling channeling our inner (excuse my French) badass Ancient Jews. 

So yeah, I, like many of my Generation Y peers, get frustrated with the modern workplace...however, as the Ancient Jews and Ethiopians so appropriately remind me this Palm Sunday, there's a time and a place to let out a little toot in the midst of your apparent butt-kissing, just to remind those who understand your plight that you're not afraid to fart in the face of "The Man."

Comments? Put 'em below. Have a friend who would enjoy some clandestine flatulence? Share this link! Have a great night :-)

How to make yourself dog-tired while pondering your career situation neurotic-style

Okay, so I'm not going to lie to you. I just woke up at about 11:22am. I didn't mean it! I actually meant to get up at about 8:30, which I did, for about 10 minutes to put some pork in the slow cooker along with a can of root beer (it's okay, you can call me a red neck) for pulled pork sandwiches later today. Then I sat on the couch for a minute with the hubby and figured I'd read a chapter or so of a book I'm working on (it is my day off, after all!) and lo and behold it was 11:22! Well, I suppose I needed it. But what, might you ask, is making me so very sleepy? Well, it just so happens the culprit is the very subject of this blog. So here's today's topic: How to make yourself dog-tired while pondering your career situation neurotic-style.

1. Look for jobs on online job boards, newspapers, potential employers' websites, etc. daily, even when you aren't sure you're ready to apply yet. 
Yeah, that's basically what I'm doing. I'll come home from work and seriously check 5 or so websites looking for anything that might suffice for the time being to pay our bills that I'm actually qualified for in the area that we're planning on moving to. I'll typically find 2-ish postings a week that I think would work financially and that I'd probably be considered for. So all is fine and dandy, right? Not so fast. You're skipping the most important step. I then have to engage in an internal war with myself about whether the job is good enough to possibly move early, leaving behind lots of summer employment opportunities...even though I have no idea what sort of opportunities will be there when I am feeling more committed to applying to loads of jobs. See how this could get tiring?

2. Try to start a series of mostly paid side ventures that you work on in your spare time, but would love to use more and more of your time on, eventually.
I'm talking about that little freelance writing thing again. Ah yes, that far away dream of mine that definitely won't be able to pay the bills for a while...but that I still need to be doing so that there's a possibility that it will in the long run. So, when I'm done checking my job boards, I check another set of job boards for blogging opportunities, people in need of article-writers, or just people who can't confidently write a grammatically correct sentence, and I apply to some of those. Now this can get really time consuming, especially because of all the different types of writing out there. I essentially need to draft a writing sample specific to each job because I don't have much of a portfolio to draw from. And then there are a few websites who actually want me to write stuff for them! So then, when I'm done, I write all of that stuff (which, in all seriousness, is loads of fun)...and, by then, you can technically call it "morning"...

3. Be in your first year of marriage.
So it would be cool of me to be a wife somewhere in the middle of all of this...which inevitably leads to us watching some 2-hour long documentary on Netflix whilst eating loads of ice cream followed by some deep conversation (yeah, we're one young and exciting couple) and...has anyone been counting how many hours it's been?

4. Spend quality time with family and friends. 
HA! 'Nuff said.

It's really a fairly simple process. Just follow these four easy steps, preferably cramming them in after a full day at work, and you too can find yourself accidentally sleeping for 12 hours on your day off.

...Which, by the way, is the best way to spend your down time, in my opinion. ;-)

Additional tips? Comments? Put 'em below! And, don't forget to share this blog with a friend! 

Today I had an epiphany...

I've been doing a lot of career-related thinking today. Work was very slow, and as you'll remember from previous posts, I always advocate daydreaming on days like today...so that's what I did. Now this wasn't what typically comes to my mind when I think about daydreaming. It wasn't a pillowy escape into cotton-candy-cloud-land or anything like that. It was more of a -getting-lost-in-deep-thoughts sort of daydreaming. So, since they were so deep ;-) I'm going to share them with you.

The thing is, something unexpected has happened. Something I didn't expect just yet. I'm actually becoming a much happier camper than I was, say, a month ago...and today I was trying to figure out why. When I left teaching, I knew I would be happier to not be in a career that I really wasn't liking and was also requiring all of my energy and most of my time. However, I also knew that what I'd be going into with my part-time jobs wouldn't be ideal...just better than what I had. And then there's the whole problem of my personal crisis of what I now want to be when I grow up, seeing that try #1 was a little off base. Needless to say, I was happier, but not really happy.

But these last 30-ish days have been a lot better, if I do say so myself. Now, I'm sure that there are a lot of factors at play, like finally feeling more used to life after college, settling into some semblance of a rhythm along with the hubby (I wouldn't call us a well-oiled machine just yet, but the gears aren't squealing anymore...), and the plain and simple fact that it's finally light past 5:00pm and I may have (knock on wood) shoveled the deck for the last time this winter. But there's one thing that really stood out in my mind today...I'm finding more ways to do things I love even if it's not at my official place of employment. I know this sounds kind of silly, as if I hadn't done anything fun outside of work until 30 days ago. That's not what I mean. Rather, I've found some things that are just mine, for this stage in my life. They're not things I used to do in college, and they're not things that the hubby and I do together. They're mine, they're productive, and they're fun. I've found more time for writing, both on this blog and other places on the internet (to which there might be links in the near future...I have to make sure I'm not breaking any rules by doing so first). I've started to have a lot of fun with cooking and finding creative yet thrifty ways to keep us healthy and yum-ified. And I'm doing it for me...which feels really good.

Aaand then I took it a step further. "Ya know," I thought to myself, "maybe I could chill out about this whole career business...I'm finding lots of other ways to be pretty fulfilled." Not to say that I'm going to stop looking for jobs or anything like that--we're still moving and will still have bills when we do so. I also don't mean to say that I'm going to look for a bum job or not do my best to find something fulfilling...it's just that today, my thick-headed self had a miniature epiphany that if things aren't all sorted out in the career department for a while, I'm going to be okay. It'll be just fine.

It doesn't sound like much of an epiphany. I mean, we all know that having fulfilling activities in your life outside of work is just called "having a life" and that it's pretty bad to not "have a life." I'm not saying that I've been a total loser when I'm not working...but more that it's just started to really be meaningful for me. If this makes any sense at all, I think I'm learning how to be me without something like a family, college, a group of friends, or a job running my life for me. And I'm likin' it.

Comments? Below! And, as always, don't forget to share this post with anyone who might enjoy it!

It's okay! Awkward people get jobs, too

You know those people who are born social leaders? They have a certain magnetism about them and they're often found at the core of social circles, serving as the hub that the other friends rotate around. If you removed enough of these people (or sometimes, just one of them) from a social group, the group would be far less connected and might even dissolve. They're those people who you catch yourself echoing in the way you speak, and you notice some of your friends have picked up a few mannerisms as well. They're so darn...charismatic.

Go ahead and Google something like "how to be charismatic." TONS of results come up and many of them are actually guides on how to become more charismatic. They talk about these people who are natural leaders, not necessarily because they possess leadership skills, but because people are drawn to them and want to be led by someone who is so magnetic. These people seem to ooze self confidence and can navigate most social situations with ease.

Yet, while sometimes big ol' bosses with loads of responsibility are quite charismatic, a lot of the time people I've met with good jobs seem kinda awkward. Even more often, it seems like they have a false charisma that they're able to pull out of their back pockets when they need it, but you can tell that it's not completely natural. They aren't born to be social leaders, but they fake it well enough to get by.

This is encouraging for me. Charisma isn't everything, nor are first impressions, apparently. I've read a few new studies that say that you can actually make up for a first impression pretty easily, as long as you're committed to your "second impression" and prove its validity with your actions. It makes me think of poor Willy Loman in Death of a Salesman who repeatedly stresses the importance of being "well liked" over being a skilled salesman. His delusions create a pretty sad life for him and his family.

Sometimes when I'm on my pity pot, I legitimately think this way. I think that people who are more charismatic or have certain seemingly inborn social advantages over me have, well, an unfair advantage. In other words, I start to think that maybe the deck is stacked against me. Now, this is clearly kinda silly. Good interviewers know how to cut through pure charisma and see skills and one's real personality.

I dunno. I just feel a little...awkward...sometimes. But I guess it doesn't matter all that much. Feeling awkward  tends to amplify your perception of your own awkwardness anyway. Or something....

Comments? Those go down there. Awkward friends to share this with? Give 'em the link! See you all tomorrow!  

At least I'm not a Chicken Sexer

If you've read some of my earlier posts, you know that I have an unhealthy, one-sided relationship with pessimism. I like me some bad news because it makes me feel better. So, as there continues to be no apparent meaningful employment opportunities where we're moving, I decided a little time with Mr. Pessimism might be a good idea for today.

When I approached Mr. Pessimism today and asked him for a little down-in-the-dumps quality conversation, he gladly obliged with a bunch of very weird stuff that people do to make a living. So, when I feel kinda bummed about my job prospects, I'm still thankful that I'm not a...:

1. Chicken sexer. Yeah, that's right. These people determine the sex of chickens when they hatch. A popular method? Anal inspection. You literally squeeze the poop out of chickens and look up their butts. Apparently males have a butthole-bump that females don't have. Gross.

2. Hair boiler. I guess our society needs boiled animal hair for something. So that's what you do as a hair boiler...boil animal hair. All the possible odors...

3. Odor tester. Speaking of odors...yeah, you get paid to smell deodorant, shampoo, etc. Maybe this one actually wouldn't be too shabby? (unless they make you smell...applied...deodorant. That's gross.) In my neurotic-ness, I'd be worried about inhaling all those chemicals.

4. IMAX screen cleaner. And I get sick of cleaning the glass shelves at work! I wonder if they let you fly around on some kind of harness to reach the whole screen. Flying would be pretty sweet, but cleaning those huge screens day in and day out? I think not.

5. Snake milker. Be honest. Did you, even just for a second, picture a snake with a little snake-sized udder getting legit milked? Well, these guys aren't looking for milk, they're looking for venom. These are the people who harvest venom from snakes so that scientists can make an anti-venom. Scary.

6. Dog food tester. I guess I always pictured dogs doing this job...but yes, they hire humans to sample dog food. They look for taste, texture and consistency of quality by...well...eating the dog food. Hopefully there are complimentary mints at the end of your shift...

7. Gum buster. Don't let the B.A.-sounding job title fool you. These are the people who scrape chewed gum off of benches and other public property. And I get upset when tourists drop crumbs on the carpet.

8. Fantasy broker. Okay. I'm not sure of the suckiness level of this one, but I just have to include it for the incredibly high ridiculousness factor. These people actually just exist to make sure you get what you want. You have a desire? Your fantasy broker gets paid to make sure it comes true. Maybe I should hire one of these guys to create a ton of highly-desirable jobs that I also just happen to be qualified for very close to a certain hubby's music school...

9. Carney. Unless you have a passion for guessing people's weights, free Churros (that's not so bad...), or just plain scamming people out of their money, I'd imagine being a Carney isn't that much fun. I like a carnival for a few hours once a year...but that's pretty much it. And the media tells me Carnies are creeeeeepy.


10. Shopping cart wrangler. This one just makes me laugh. As if the shopping carts need to be lassoed and tied. If there's anyone reading who works a job where part of your responsibility is to gather shopping carts from the parking lot, you can officially say something like, "I'm a Sales Associate at Home Depot, but I do some Cart Wrangling on the side," when people ask you what you do. Keep on wranglin'.

Phew, I feel much better. I've gotten a good laugh out of a few of these while a few others have helped me maintain my unhealthy relationship with Mr. Pessimism (we all know I just use him when I feel like crap). So, the next time you're dreading a day on the job, or you-just-can't-believe-it's-only-been-two-hours, remember...

...at least you're not a Chicken Sexer. 


Please share any reactions or other ridiculous/horrible jobs below! And don't forget to share this post with anyone else who could use some time with Mr. Pessimism ;-) 

Newsflash: Facebook doesn't care about my "brand," thanks.

Every now and then as I'm looking for jobs, or sometimes even when I'm just cruisin' the internet, I'll get curious and click on those job-search related articles that are always on job websites. The ones I usually go for are of the "10 Things You Are Screwing Up as You Look for Jobs" variety. Who me? Completely messing up my job search? I can't resist it.

Usually it's pretty basic stuff. Tailor your resume for each job you apply to, create a personal cover letter for each job, talk to people who already do the job and build relationships. Easy peasy. However, there's always one more that kinda rubs me the wrong way. The social networking tip.

Now, don't get me wrong, I totally support having a professional online presence and even using social networking to...well...network. You definitely don't want employers to Google your name and find a treasure trove of depravity, just like "liking" relevant professional organizations on Facebook could help build potential employers' confidence in your professionalism. We all know this.

However, I highly doubt that there are tons of HR-ers scouring Facebook for people who have "liked" their company page and then creepin' on their profiles as if it were a resume. I also highly doubt you're going to get a job offer simply because you say intelligent things on Twitter and have a current LinkedIn page. But there are several articles I've read that would disagree. Some have even gone so far to say that Facebook profiles will be used in place of resumes within the next few years. I don't think we're headed there quite yet.

Or at least I hope we aren't! I want to feel free to post stupid videos on my wall whenever I want. I want to be able to creep on your vacation pictures even though I haven't spoken to you in five years. I might even want to read your emo-lyric-status-updates every now and then. I don't want to feel like everything I do on the internet has to reinforce my personal brand that I'm trying to sell to employers. Sometimes, a girl just wants to have fun and network with her friends, not recruiters.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that if Facebook and LinkedIn had a baby, I might create a profile for employers. That wouldn't be so bad...just as long as Facebook is still the fun parent and keeps all of its privacy settings ;-).

Comments? Down there. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Share it! And, as always, have a great night. 

The downside of jobs that pay the bills: So much ennui!

Okay, so my job(s) are really fine. I like the people I work for and with, and there are different good things about each job I have. However, I don't think I've really found my "calling" yet. And does anyone really ever find their "calling" in the workplace? Sometimes. But I think there are a lot more people who work for the paycheck and get through the day because they have to, at least to a certain degree. I know if I stopped getting a paycheck I wouldn't hang around my jobs just for kicks and giggles.

That said, one of the things I struggle with in my current positions is staying motivated on a day-to-day basis. It's hard for me when I only help 5 customers in the course of a day, or when I'm swamped and just wayyy too tired to deal with people. It's one thing if you truly feel like what you're doing makes a difference or has personal meaning for you...but I'd say with most jobs in any given city, that's not the case.

So here are a few things that help me get through the harder days:

1. Tune out the drama. It is my personal experience that when people are a little bored at work, they tend to...erm...exaggerate perceived "wrongdoings" and loooove to run their mouths about who said what to them and how they're getting their schedule changed because working with so-and-so is just so intolerable. Don't participate in it. It probably contributes to that headache you have at the end of the day.

2. Add to your job description where appropriate. Is there anything your boss possibly wants but has nobody to do? Perhaps she wants a Facebook page for the business, or would like someone to research local advertising opportunities. If you're in a position to offer to help, do so. If she accepts your offer it will give you a much-needed change of pace and something else to put on your resume besides "provided excellent customer service."

3. Could it be that slacking off is making you dislike your job more? Do a good job. Slacking off on the job leads to a lazy attitude, which makes it harder in the long run to get motivated at all. I find that maintaining a certain level of productivity at the very least makes the day go by faster and ensures that my boss remains happy with me as an employee.

4. Don't let your job run your life. Take up a hobby, like blogging ;-). Make sure you have enough social interaction outside of work. Don't talk about work all night at home. Remember, your job is how you make money. It doesn't need to affect much more of your life than that.

5. Pretend you like it. I touched on this in a previous post, but for me, pretending I like my job actually makes it a little less painful on the bad days. I think this has something to do with how much energy it takes to be miserable. I usually give up the fight within the first hour of work.

6. If you really loathe your job, take some steps forward. Start a job search. Or at least update your resume and do a little Googling. Every little step will remind you that you can really choose to leave whenever it's convenient for you. You are by no means ever truly "trapped."

7. Fill your day with something. If you're bored, you're probably going to resort to playing the ol' "I-hate-my-life-right-now-this-is-such-a-waste-of-time" mantra in your head. That's no good. Go ahead, clean that counter for the fourth time today.

8. Don't let someone else ruin your day. Maybe it's your boss, a customer or another coworker who's trying to rain on your parade. Maybe they bring their stress to work precisely so they can dump it on you, or maybe someone is having a really crappy family vacation, and decides that you deserve some of that pent-up frustration. Pardon my French, but screw 'em...politely, of course. You probably don't get paid enough to deal with their problems anyway.

9. Sometimes daydreams are still a girl's best friend. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Forget diamonds. Going somewhere else inside your head when the going gets boring can be just enough of an escape to get you through your shift.

10. Remember, they do pay you. Thankfully, you're not granting anyone any favors. You're performing a series of tasks for pay. If it was free, I'm guessing you wouldn't be there.

Like I said before, the employment I have is fine. It pays my bills (mostly) and it's not like I get 50 lashes upon walking through the door. However, sometimes little annoyances will build up. Some days I'm experiencing a little bit more ennui than others. Whatever the reason, there are days when it bothers me that so much of my day is spent doing something that might not have much meaning at all, doesn't use very many of my personal skills, and doesn't produce much enjoyment for me. Sigh. Alas, I know that some of you have to be in this boat with me. At least we aren't in it alone?

More tips? Comments? Put 'em down there. And don't forget to share this blog with others in the my-job-sometimes-feels-meaningless boat. Have a great night!

Gene Simmons sells life insurance? Switching careers using those transferable skills

Today, I'm a little bit shocked to say that I may have learned something from this guy:

Yeah, that's right, Gene Simmons of KISS. I read this article today describing the rock star's newest career venture. Besides marketing KISS and Simmons' token celebrity reality show, his resume now includes selling life insurance! And not just any life insurance, life insurance for the super-rich (you have to be worth at least $20 million to be considered). 

So, how did Simmons transform from the above pic, to third from the left in this one on the company's website?

Reportedly, the Cool Springs life insurance company offered him the deal because of:

1. His celebrity network that just so happens to easily meet the $20 million net worth requirement. 

2. The publicity the "curious" new deal would draw.

3. His no-nonsense and effective marking strategies, as demonstrated in selling out KISS shows, and capitalizing on tons of other swag. 

Now, I'm going to set my discontentment with the wealthy serving the wealthy on the back burner for a moment and try to learn something related to the purpose of the blog from this handsome piece of news. Essentially, what Simmons has done is offer transferable skills to a new career path--and isn't that what experts are always telling us career switchers and seekers to do? Focus on your skills that can apply to a variety of positions. 

Too bad "famous" seems to be the main transferable skill in this particular scenario...

So anyone want to grab some dollar store face paint, hot leather pants, and hit the road with me? Just think of the opportunities...

Thoughts? 

I don't mean to butt in, but...

Ah yes, family and friends. What would we do without them? They're the people you call when you need support, advice, or when something totally craaazy happens on your favorite show, and they do the same with you. However, have you ever had a family member or friend offer up their unsolicited opinion at a very inopportune time? I'm guessing that might as well be a rhetorical question.

Yeah, it happens to everybody. You're on the phone with Aunt Velma comparing how much snow each of your towns got in the last Nor'easter. Then, somewhere between "It took the plows all night to clean up the roads" and "Did you hear about the next post-April-1st-colossal-snow-dumping we're supposed to get?" she slips in a little "By the way, I just read an article in BestAdviceForYouAndYourBadDecisionMakingSkills Magazine that said August is the worst month to look for an apartment and that job growth is expected to decrease right up until then. Isn't that when you were going to try to move?"

What do they expect you to say? "Hmm well I guess I'd better put my life on hold if that's what BestAdviceForYouAndYourBadDecisionMakingSkills is saying." Or maybe they really want you to say something like "Wow, I guess I really need you to help me run my life. I'd better never try to become an adult on my own." I feel like that second one is more like it for a lot of us twenty-somethings.

Now, I'm not saying that I think family members shouldn't be able to offer advice or voice their opinions. However, I do think that the advice-giving gets a little more forceful and unsolicited during times of transition, like a job search, and often isn't meant as legitimate, loving advice...but borders more on scare-tactics and the exaggeration of one's opinion. That said, here's my unsolicited and oversimplified advice for anyone in such a predicament:

1. Advice is only good if you can use it. 
That means "I think you shouldn't move" does not qualify as advice. Advice should be something that helps you toward your goal. It shouldn't scare you away from it.

2. Even if advice may be useful and comes from a credible source, if it doesn't work for you it's no good. 
I'll illustrate this one with a personal experience. I can't count how many times my husband has been told by someone to buy a planner and write down important dates. He comes across as a little bohemian and flighty, and there are a lot of people out there who think he needs fixing. However, he's tried this before and every time he forgets to write things down, doesn't have his planner with him when he needs it, or writes something down and then doesn't look at his planner again until after the date has passed. Needless to say, although the planner system does work for a lot of people, it just wastes time and energy for the hubby. I'm sure you can find many parallels in your own life.

3. You don't have to agree with 'em just because you love 'em. 
This one is my weakness. I never want to insult anyone by completely disregarding their advice, even if it is given with less than honorable intentions. I usually play the smile-and-nod card and then just try not to bring the issue up again and hopefully they'll forget what they suggested and not follow-up. I know, I know, I'm so fearless and wise ;-).

I know a lot of my readers' families and friends, and I know that a lot of you are surrounded by fantastic people. But even the fantasticest of the fantastic can step on toes and hold you back at times. Especially when you're going through a change that might effect your relationship with the person in question. Then things get messy...

Comments? Additional unsolicited advice? Put 'em below! And don't forget to share with a friend!