It's okay! Awkward people get jobs, too

You know those people who are born social leaders? They have a certain magnetism about them and they're often found at the core of social circles, serving as the hub that the other friends rotate around. If you removed enough of these people (or sometimes, just one of them) from a social group, the group would be far less connected and might even dissolve. They're those people who you catch yourself echoing in the way you speak, and you notice some of your friends have picked up a few mannerisms as well. They're so darn...charismatic.

Go ahead and Google something like "how to be charismatic." TONS of results come up and many of them are actually guides on how to become more charismatic. They talk about these people who are natural leaders, not necessarily because they possess leadership skills, but because people are drawn to them and want to be led by someone who is so magnetic. These people seem to ooze self confidence and can navigate most social situations with ease.

Yet, while sometimes big ol' bosses with loads of responsibility are quite charismatic, a lot of the time people I've met with good jobs seem kinda awkward. Even more often, it seems like they have a false charisma that they're able to pull out of their back pockets when they need it, but you can tell that it's not completely natural. They aren't born to be social leaders, but they fake it well enough to get by.

This is encouraging for me. Charisma isn't everything, nor are first impressions, apparently. I've read a few new studies that say that you can actually make up for a first impression pretty easily, as long as you're committed to your "second impression" and prove its validity with your actions. It makes me think of poor Willy Loman in Death of a Salesman who repeatedly stresses the importance of being "well liked" over being a skilled salesman. His delusions create a pretty sad life for him and his family.

Sometimes when I'm on my pity pot, I legitimately think this way. I think that people who are more charismatic or have certain seemingly inborn social advantages over me have, well, an unfair advantage. In other words, I start to think that maybe the deck is stacked against me. Now, this is clearly kinda silly. Good interviewers know how to cut through pure charisma and see skills and one's real personality.

I dunno. I just feel a little...awkward...sometimes. But I guess it doesn't matter all that much. Feeling awkward  tends to amplify your perception of your own awkwardness anyway. Or something....

Comments? Those go down there. Awkward friends to share this with? Give 'em the link! See you all tomorrow!